We are getting a house, yes we are!
It's perfect and words cannot express how happy I am about this. We found this house in the Salem area (down the street from the school!). It is 1400 sq ft with a back yard, basement, front porch, back porch and a dining room. We move on September 1st into this house and I'm so excited about it.
We will rent it for 5 years and than we will buy it from the guy. So the money that we are putting into it goes towards the mortgage. Which is awesome so by the end it'll be a bit paid off and we can get a loan for the remaining amount of the house. I can't wait to be able to do what we want to a house and make it ours. It's 3 bedroom so when we decide to do foster care we will be able to do it. The boys will shack up together because the rooms are big enough as well. So here we are packing up again!
Thank you to those who have been so supportive.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
What is a healthy marriage?
I am wondering what others would say to this. It's a big topic right now in my Love & Marriage group on Cafemom. I was inspired to write something about it from my own personal experience. As a moderator of the group I get to see everyone else experience's and get to relate, give advice and truly make a difference in peoples lives. That is what I truly think I was put on this earth to do.
There was a time where my relationship was not the best. We have had our ups and downs with the things we have been through. We have had a scary past 2 years with Austin that has challenged our marriage. There were times where I wanted to give up but knew that I loved my husband so much that I could never give up on that. He is my soul mate and I love him. There were times where we were screaming at each other out of anger and when we later realized how unhealthy it was for us we decided that we would be totally honest with each other.
Alex is the one person who knows me better than anyone else. I'm able to share with him things that sometimes spouses do not share with each other. Some things that are very personal and I may not share with anyone else. To be able to be that HONEST and OPEN with someone takes a lot of trust. So trust is one of the biggest things to a healthy relationship. Open communication, even when it's hard to be able to tell the person how you feel. If your husband or wife is doing something that might be a tad bit annoying or something that you dislike, just tell them. If you do not tell them, guess what? You will get angry at yourself or them and that all builds up. I am not saying that I'm a relationship advice person but through trial in error in my own marriage we have figured out what would work.
Take your time on things. This is not saying each task you can sit around and do nothing and at the last minute do it. Take your time when it comes to getting to know each other in a relationship. Whether this be a beginning or a relationship or a marriage. You learn so much about your spouse after you are a married. Things may not seem to change but they do, tremendously. You are not only thinking about yourself but the person that you are with. What use to be easy choices on your own may not be so easy any more.
Sacrifice when you can for another. Sometimes there are certain situations where you have to choose one way or another. Will we go to this family picnic or will we go to the zoo? Make sure that you do the things that are right for your family not only yourself. Sometimes being in a relationship you got to be a little selfless. You got to think not only about your partner but if you have kids them as well. I know we have sacrificed so many date nights because we would rather stay home with the kids or it just didn't pan out. Sometimes we are to tired to do anything and would rather watch a kids movie with our little ones than go out together.
My parents have always taught me that Family is #1. I would do anything for my family and give up anything that I can to help someone out in my family. Some people do not have these same values but I believe if do this you will always have someone behind you able to help you when you need it. You might fight of bicker with your partner but that should be behind closed doors. Or that's my opinion, you may have something else. Or if you are able to have a healthy discussion in front of your children that's fine as well. I'm not saying hide your adult conversations from your kids but if there is screaming than that is not good for children to see.
I know the one time that I did this I felt so guilty and hurt that my child had to see me this way. Maybe I'm overreacting but I don't think that I am. I think there are some things that should be kept behind closed doors. Make sure you have time for each other. That is big. I know there are times where we won't go on date nights but we will sit next to each other and enjoy a video game together or something. I love cuddling with my husband and just talking. Text messages and Facebook messages through the day helps out a lot as well.
Making sure you kiss each other good night and good morning helps a lot too.
There was a time where my relationship was not the best. We have had our ups and downs with the things we have been through. We have had a scary past 2 years with Austin that has challenged our marriage. There were times where I wanted to give up but knew that I loved my husband so much that I could never give up on that. He is my soul mate and I love him. There were times where we were screaming at each other out of anger and when we later realized how unhealthy it was for us we decided that we would be totally honest with each other.
Alex is the one person who knows me better than anyone else. I'm able to share with him things that sometimes spouses do not share with each other. Some things that are very personal and I may not share with anyone else. To be able to be that HONEST and OPEN with someone takes a lot of trust. So trust is one of the biggest things to a healthy relationship. Open communication, even when it's hard to be able to tell the person how you feel. If your husband or wife is doing something that might be a tad bit annoying or something that you dislike, just tell them. If you do not tell them, guess what? You will get angry at yourself or them and that all builds up. I am not saying that I'm a relationship advice person but through trial in error in my own marriage we have figured out what would work.
Take your time on things. This is not saying each task you can sit around and do nothing and at the last minute do it. Take your time when it comes to getting to know each other in a relationship. Whether this be a beginning or a relationship or a marriage. You learn so much about your spouse after you are a married. Things may not seem to change but they do, tremendously. You are not only thinking about yourself but the person that you are with. What use to be easy choices on your own may not be so easy any more.
Sacrifice when you can for another. Sometimes there are certain situations where you have to choose one way or another. Will we go to this family picnic or will we go to the zoo? Make sure that you do the things that are right for your family not only yourself. Sometimes being in a relationship you got to be a little selfless. You got to think not only about your partner but if you have kids them as well. I know we have sacrificed so many date nights because we would rather stay home with the kids or it just didn't pan out. Sometimes we are to tired to do anything and would rather watch a kids movie with our little ones than go out together.
My parents have always taught me that Family is #1. I would do anything for my family and give up anything that I can to help someone out in my family. Some people do not have these same values but I believe if do this you will always have someone behind you able to help you when you need it. You might fight of bicker with your partner but that should be behind closed doors. Or that's my opinion, you may have something else. Or if you are able to have a healthy discussion in front of your children that's fine as well. I'm not saying hide your adult conversations from your kids but if there is screaming than that is not good for children to see.
I know the one time that I did this I felt so guilty and hurt that my child had to see me this way. Maybe I'm overreacting but I don't think that I am. I think there are some things that should be kept behind closed doors. Make sure you have time for each other. That is big. I know there are times where we won't go on date nights but we will sit next to each other and enjoy a video game together or something. I love cuddling with my husband and just talking. Text messages and Facebook messages through the day helps out a lot as well.
Making sure you kiss each other good night and good morning helps a lot too.
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Nationwide Children's Hospital
So for a while now I have thought about trying to do something for Children's Hospital but I have never done an event like this. My hopes is that we will be able to do something AMAZING for the boys and girls in the hospital. During Christmas time they do awesome events so that they can give every children that is seen in there a toy for Christmas and there are always tons of people who donate than so I want to do something not around that time. Kind of get people a rest from donating so I am thinking of something in April or May. What I would love to do is every time we go into the hospital there is always someone giving your child a gift to kind of make the stay a bit more bearable. And I want to be able to give that to them. So take the list of things that we needed and have people either donate toys or donate money towards getting the toys and wagons that they need for these lovely children!
I'm coming up with plans on things I can donate and people I can have get involved with this. Children's Hospital has done so much for me and I want to be able to make sure that I'm able to give back to them in every way possible. I know the journey I'm on is hard but it's worth it when you have safe like them to help us out on the road.
I'm coming up with plans on things I can donate and people I can have get involved with this. Children's Hospital has done so much for me and I want to be able to make sure that I'm able to give back to them in every way possible. I know the journey I'm on is hard but it's worth it when you have safe like them to help us out on the road.
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Medical Stuff with Austin
So update on Austin's medical issues:
For those who do not know, Austin has been diagnosed with Spastic Quadriplegic Cerebral Palsy, HIE, Laryngomolacia, Tracheomalacia, high muscle tone, global delays, failure to thrive, G/J tube placement, Plyoric Stenosis, Complex Epilepsy (including Infantile Spasms), GERD and a few other medical issues. Sometimes typing them all up I always miss something.
With Austin's complex medical history there is always something that could come up along the way. Austin cannot take anything my mouth because he aspirates (could go down to his lungs) since he cannot protect his airway. So with him throwing up he can aspirate even more! So back on April 18th we went into a scope so we could do the surgery called a Nissen (to help with the throwing up!) and he came out of it with a temp of 104.5 and oxygen level of 85%. Even with all his medical issues he has ALWAYS been a 100% or 99% for oxygen level!
I didn't get to see my son until 2.5 hours after they had promised. I was worried, confused, and sadden when they had told me. This was the second time he had a hard time coming off of anesthesia so it got me worried about him. I was in tears as they were running test after test on my poor little baby. We found out after getting admitted he had gotten pneumonia and RSV. Normally, if you have RSV it can cause pneumonia but after a lot of test they found out that it was bacterial pneumonia. SO he was put on antibiotics for that and of course had been on oxygen. He stayed in the hospital for 5 days. So with big aspirations it can cause pneumonia, it's part of his life we have to over come and keep trying to make him as healthy as we can.
So we got a referral in the hospital for ENT (ear, nose, and throat doctor) to come visit. Things looked good on their part but on the Pulmonary aspect things didn't look so hot. Since he cannot protect his air way we have to talk with them to make sure that we do all we can to help with the small aspirations so perhaps we can prevent pneumonia as much as we can. So the pulmonary doctor asked about family history of breathing issues which was a laugh since we have family history of emphysema.
So at the end she had decided on an steroid inhaler given, 2 puffs, twice a day for him. This will help protect his lungs and in the long term keep him out of the hospital. So let's help it works. On other news since he got out of the hospital April 22nd he had pooped 7/8 times in a month so we went into the hospital again for a 1 day stay. Which he was so backed up it was coming out of his g tube site.:( Poor guy! He can't win. SO now he's on medicine to make sure he stays regular. It's a pain in the butt to give to him but it's worth it. The clean up does suck though! So there is an update on Austin. We got more medical appointments coming up including physical medicine, neuro, and ophthalmology next week so THAT will be an interesting time that I will update you guys all up. Next week we are schedule for 7 appointments in 1 week so I'm not looking forward to it!
For those who do not know, Austin has been diagnosed with Spastic Quadriplegic Cerebral Palsy, HIE, Laryngomolacia, Tracheomalacia, high muscle tone, global delays, failure to thrive, G/J tube placement, Plyoric Stenosis, Complex Epilepsy (including Infantile Spasms), GERD and a few other medical issues. Sometimes typing them all up I always miss something.
With Austin's complex medical history there is always something that could come up along the way. Austin cannot take anything my mouth because he aspirates (could go down to his lungs) since he cannot protect his airway. So with him throwing up he can aspirate even more! So back on April 18th we went into a scope so we could do the surgery called a Nissen (to help with the throwing up!) and he came out of it with a temp of 104.5 and oxygen level of 85%. Even with all his medical issues he has ALWAYS been a 100% or 99% for oxygen level!
I didn't get to see my son until 2.5 hours after they had promised. I was worried, confused, and sadden when they had told me. This was the second time he had a hard time coming off of anesthesia so it got me worried about him. I was in tears as they were running test after test on my poor little baby. We found out after getting admitted he had gotten pneumonia and RSV. Normally, if you have RSV it can cause pneumonia but after a lot of test they found out that it was bacterial pneumonia. SO he was put on antibiotics for that and of course had been on oxygen. He stayed in the hospital for 5 days. So with big aspirations it can cause pneumonia, it's part of his life we have to over come and keep trying to make him as healthy as we can.
So we got a referral in the hospital for ENT (ear, nose, and throat doctor) to come visit. Things looked good on their part but on the Pulmonary aspect things didn't look so hot. Since he cannot protect his air way we have to talk with them to make sure that we do all we can to help with the small aspirations so perhaps we can prevent pneumonia as much as we can. So the pulmonary doctor asked about family history of breathing issues which was a laugh since we have family history of emphysema.
So at the end she had decided on an steroid inhaler given, 2 puffs, twice a day for him. This will help protect his lungs and in the long term keep him out of the hospital. So let's help it works. On other news since he got out of the hospital April 22nd he had pooped 7/8 times in a month so we went into the hospital again for a 1 day stay. Which he was so backed up it was coming out of his g tube site.:( Poor guy! He can't win. SO now he's on medicine to make sure he stays regular. It's a pain in the butt to give to him but it's worth it. The clean up does suck though! So there is an update on Austin. We got more medical appointments coming up including physical medicine, neuro, and ophthalmology next week so THAT will be an interesting time that I will update you guys all up. Next week we are schedule for 7 appointments in 1 week so I'm not looking forward to it!
Supermom
I'm just a mom who is trying to do what is best for my family, isn't that what you are doing as well? All we do in life is making sure that we do what is best for our family and just make sure they are happy. As a mother and a wife I do this, every single day, and some days are harder than others. I'll admit with the average of 3 hours of sleep I get a night is hard to take. 6 days a week this is about my average and I know I need help. I'll be the first to admit that there is somethings I cannot do on my own. I've done my part to try to get our case for a nurse going but it seems like there are some more issues going on that I may realize.
I know things are ran by the government and our insurance companies but there is only so much things one person can handle. This month is our busy month, with 14 appointments, 4 medicine pick ups, 1 formula pick up and 3 home visits. It's hard to do it all and run a business. But guess what? My husband and I are doing it.
If you would like to judge me for asking for help, than that's fine! I've had a lot of people who have never been in my place try to judge me about the need for help with Austin. The last time my husband and I were out on our own together was November 2011. It's sad, but true. We had been trying to do it every month but with how things are going and us not being able to leave Austin it's not our fault. We have family who can help us and they do help us but for us taking care of our kids are number 1. Though me being around the kids 24/7 is hard, but I get to be the one to raise them, not have someone else raise them. Not come home tired from work and not being able to play with them (not saying this is everyone). I just remember when I was working, I'd come home and be so tired I didn't want to do anything. I'd be grumpy.
Now I get to spend all the time I can with my kids and be the best mother, home with them, and them enjoying me while they are out of school. 2013 will change things when they BOTH go to school. I'm excited, scared, and worried about it but that is because they've been with me. I have NEVER been away from Austin more than 8 hours and that's when I was working outside of the house for a few months before they downgraded their staff. I couldn't imagine having someone else take care of him all the time. So I know even when we have a nurse come in (my cousin) it's going to be hard for me to adjust! I do need help. But I do not want someone else to do my job for me. I have hard enough time letting my husband take over.
Perhaps it's the control freak in me.
That is all about this ramble, now to move onto others.
Monday, May 7, 2012
A smile is worth a million words
So the Friday after my baptism Astrid had came over to the house just to get to know me and also welcome me to the ward. I did not know that today was a miracle day as well. Since I have been in the church I have noticed so many different things happening. I am not saying that life is going to be easy now because it's not but there are so many blessings that I have received since I have joined the church and this one is the most important one of them all.On Friday April 27th 2012 Austin smiled for the first time when he was awake!
Here are Austin's beautiful smiles! He has lighten up my day so much since he started to smile. I think that Heavenly Father has truly blessed me with this. Some people might think it was just him being delayed but there were so many doctors who said he would never be able to do a lot of these things and by doing this he's proving them wrong. That they are not god. That even though they know a lot and got a good education. So here I am today saying that Heavenly Father is truly amazing. I devote my life and my families lives to him.
My baptism
So as most of you guys know I had decided to convert to the Church of Jesus Chris of Latter-day Saints and had made this commitment for a while after I found out that the church was true. I know a lot of people do not know much about the mormon church and believe we believe in multiple marriages, which is NOT true. To the church the one thing most sacred is marriage and even though it had been practice so many years ago they had decided to stop the practice.
I remember trying to leave the hospital when Austin was there and trying to make it. I had to stop by home and grab some clothes and than had to head to dublin. If you are from Ohio and know to go from Children's to Worthington area and than to dublin is a bit of a commute. On my way my tower blew! I was so upset and I was grateful that I had multiple pairs of clothes that day. For some reason I knew I had to pack extra clothes. (Perhaps a sign). There was so many things that stood in my way since I had made this choice. I know the day of Austin's scope was my interview date and since we went in and he was in the hospital we were unable to do it. So since we were going to be in another day the Elder's came to me. They were so committed to me as I was to Heavenly Father. I wanted nothing more to be able to be baptized. Than on Saturday, running late and making sure I got there on time.
I got there at the same time as Amy and Brian did and got to go and get changed. I truly got to be there and feel the spirit as I was there. Than Elder Hepworth baptized me. I remember that I kept saying 'Don't let me drown' I was scared to go into the water. I don't know why I was scared. I was so excited to get baptized do not get em wrong but for some reason I was nervous at the same time. But as soon as I was baptized I felt how this wonderful surge. It was so powerful! So welcoming. My sins were washed away that very moment and I knew that the steps I had made were perfect. I had felt so happy and at peace. I wanted to share my story with everyone around me.
I had truly found the church that was true. I believed every word of it. It made sense to me and there was nothing I could do to feel more right at home than where I was. I was surrounded by some amazing people! My friends who had been there through such like the Beth's and Nick. Than my new friends who were members of the church who were there for me. I can't believe how honored I am to have thse amazing people in my life.
This is me before I went underwater. In the white is Elder Hepworth who baptized me and than Elder Mack who has also done so much for me. Both of these guys are amazing men and can't see what amazing things that Heavenly Father has planned for them. They will truly change the lives of many.
I remember trying to leave the hospital when Austin was there and trying to make it. I had to stop by home and grab some clothes and than had to head to dublin. If you are from Ohio and know to go from Children's to Worthington area and than to dublin is a bit of a commute. On my way my tower blew! I was so upset and I was grateful that I had multiple pairs of clothes that day. For some reason I knew I had to pack extra clothes. (Perhaps a sign). There was so many things that stood in my way since I had made this choice. I know the day of Austin's scope was my interview date and since we went in and he was in the hospital we were unable to do it. So since we were going to be in another day the Elder's came to me. They were so committed to me as I was to Heavenly Father. I wanted nothing more to be able to be baptized. Than on Saturday, running late and making sure I got there on time.
I got there at the same time as Amy and Brian did and got to go and get changed. I truly got to be there and feel the spirit as I was there. Than Elder Hepworth baptized me. I remember that I kept saying 'Don't let me drown' I was scared to go into the water. I don't know why I was scared. I was so excited to get baptized do not get em wrong but for some reason I was nervous at the same time. But as soon as I was baptized I felt how this wonderful surge. It was so powerful! So welcoming. My sins were washed away that very moment and I knew that the steps I had made were perfect. I had felt so happy and at peace. I wanted to share my story with everyone around me.
I had truly found the church that was true. I believed every word of it. It made sense to me and there was nothing I could do to feel more right at home than where I was. I was surrounded by some amazing people! My friends who had been there through such like the Beth's and Nick. Than my new friends who were members of the church who were there for me. I can't believe how honored I am to have thse amazing people in my life.
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